At the time when great sorrow was filling my heart, I did not want to eat anything at all. Nothing could replace the hurt and pain that had me completely paralyzed into not wanting to do or feel anything. The desire for food and my appetite were zero. I speak of the pain from the loss of my husband who passed away at the end of October, on the most beautiful fall day.
Who wants to eat when your heart is broken? Eventually, I did bring myself to the table, but food wasn’t the same. The world wasn’t the same, so why should meals be the same? Ahhhh, but enter the words “COMFORT FOOD” into your vocabulary and hmm... I think my first “feel good” food wasn’t even a meal; it was heading up to the very best ice cream place in Warwick, NY and having a few scoops of “The Great White Way”. Savoring each spoon while looking over the valley of Warwick, it was flooding my heart with memories of the times my husband and I were together and enjoying that very same view while spooning down the delicious creamy soft sweetness, smiling and laughing, or just being quiet and taking in the beauty. Yes, it helped me to sooth the hurt in my heart... comfort food was and is necessary in our healing process.
Comfort food is named appropriately, it’s like what my cousin Judy says when she makes her morning cookie batch… “I needed a warm hug”. I’d like for you to be honest and tell me how many of these top 10 comfort foods are on your list:
Counting Down:
10) Donuts
9) Fried Chicken
8) Chocolate Chip Cookies
7) Mashed Potatoes
6) Mac & Cheese
5) French Fries
4) Ice Cream
3) Pizza
2) Chocolate
and the #1 TOP comfort food is Grilled Cheese!
Variations of any of these foods work for me – admittedly. I am totally going for 8 out of 10 here. If you add smores and bagels... that’s me - a 10!
I can be scientific and tell you what triggers happen to your brain that make the comfort food give you the feel that everything is ok, even for just little while. We all know what donuts or bagels on a regular diet will do to our waistline, but when you’re needing the comfort and for the time that you are grieving, who really cares?
I feel that I should share the “why” part from Psychology Today’s article on
5 Reasons Why We Crave Comfort Foods
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/science-choice/201609/5-reasons-why-we-crave-comfort-foods
An International Bodybuilder, Personal Trainer and Women’s Coach (and my dear adopted daughter), Christine Ajisafe (@toolegitandfit_chris ((link here to her instagram)) talks and teaches about intuitive eating. Here is what she says about Comfort Food:
“It is not a bad thing, especially during the grieving process, it is normal and expected. At a certain point though, you do need to recognize that your body will need to figure out other ways of coping with your grief. But grieving and comfort food are certainly ok!"
- putting both Christine’s thoughts and Psychology Today together, I can only come up with 1 answer:
Comfort Food is
a necessary part of
the grieving process!
Be kind to yourself and let your heart heal, for it is a process and a necessary stop to move forward with life. I’ve since, weaned off the bagel breakfast with my side of 6 chocolate squares and traded it in for my morning green smoothie (truthfully the smoothie is preceded by a few of my cousins “warm hugs”… aka warm chocolate chip cookies), but I know that I’m getting there and moving forward in my process of healing.
Feel free to write in and let me know your favorites that are not on the list. My recipe for my smoothie and warm hugs are available using the links below or sending me an email.
Chocolate Chip Cookie Recipe (pdf)
Gloria's Green Smoothie Recipe (pdf)
Who I am? An artist who is living, breathing, and working to create Unique & Artistic Cremation Urns. After going through the process of losing my husband, I would like to share my journey with you and decided to add this blog page.
Dedicated to my late husband Ron ~Let your light shine bright in my heart forever.
